School of Stress

    School stress is a normal part of life, Right? I am not the only person that got anxious for tests or presentations. I am not the only person that developed an upset stomach during Final exams. Have you ever had to rush out of an exam to explode in the bathroom? Yep literally, my stress and anxiety caused severe IBS. It was always an issue since at least 8th grade. I bet if you are reading this now, at some point in your life you remember a time during your education where STRESS was on your mind and evident in your BODY. Maybe it was a teacher that spoke to you in a negative way or put you down. Maybe it was an obstacle you faced early on in your education that caused you to loose a little self-confidence or created a little self-doubt. Maybe, your parents were very strict and expected perfect grades adding extra pressure to an already stressful experience. The cause of the stress response is usually related to a deeply engrained emotional reaction in you subconscious mind. Trust me, I had no idea this was possible until almost a year ago. I thought anxiety was a perfectly normal part of life. I though that it was just my way of dealing with school. It was normal for me to study my butt off, know everything by heart and blank out on a test. It was normal for me to second guess myself and switch the answer on the test. Then I would spend nights worrying some more after the test was over. And then reviewing tests, I began to recognize a pattern over the years. My gut first answer was usually right but I always managed to second guess myself and change it.

    Looking back now, I realize that my insecurities were linked to my learning disabilities and family history of learning disabilities. I developed this fear of school that progressively got worse over time. I developed a sense of self-doubt and worry that impacted me throughout my career. I didn’t let it stop me though, I pushed through and managed to graduate High-School with honors. I pushed through it, over and over again. Two careers and Master’s education didn’t seem to stop me but deep down the insecurities blocked me from finding my true purpose. Some how, I managed to graduate with honors time after time but the impact on my body was pretty catastrophic over the years. The Negative thoughts impacted me during my Master’s degree to a point of absolute panic. I actually remember a day where my research paper completely vanished off my computer. The file vanished. AHHH! Seriously, it completely disappeared a few minutes before the submission deadline. My stress and anxiety hit me hard and fast. It felt like a kick in my chest. Fear overwhelmed me and worry made me feel helpless. I dropped down to the floor in a panic and cried uncontrollably until thankfully my husband found it. I had never experienced such an intense stress response before. It was the peak of my chronic illness, anxiety and stress. It was my worst panic to date and I thought I was doomed but everything worked out. Thankfully, as I mentioned before I was a great student and my paper was amazing. Somehow, I surpassed my own internal fears and worry to graduate with honors, once again. But these embedded childhood challenges continued to arise throughout my life. Self-doubt, fear and worry would impact me in all aspects of life. I finally decided something had to shift. I realized that these negative feelings were not aligned with my path in life. I had succeeded and overcome so much, it was time for my mind to catch up and wake up. It was time to shift this crazy negative mindset and leave the past in the past. It was time to believe in myself and release the past. No one deserves to live a life of self-doubt, worry and fear. Everyone deserves to THRIVE NATURALLY in their own skin. Everything fell into place at the right moment in time. I was READY. I was willing. And I was dedicated to finding my path. INVEST in YOURSELF. You deserve to THRIVE. You deserve to feel Healthy. You deserve to feel Prosperous too.