Category Archives: motivation

    Categories Advice, Anxiety, Emotional pain, Fear, flare up, freedom, Health, motivation, positivity, self-actualization, Self-doubt, Speak your mind, stress relief, Worry

    Rock Bottom to Awareness

    How do you get up from rock bottom?

    What do you do when you fall on your butt?

    What do you do when it feels like everything is falling apart?

    What do you do when life keeps sending you obstacles that throw you off course?

     

    Life always seems to send obstacles and challenges to throw us of course.  These obstacles can create frustration, stress and anxiety within us.  The journey can be annoying and difficult when you allow the stressful emotions to take over.  But actually each unique challenge is meant to make us stronger as we learn and grow. I have had plenty of rock bottom moments.  So many moments that threw me completely off course because stress got in the way.  And in the heat of the moment getting caught in the overwhelm and frustration creates havoc in our lives.  I have made plenty of these mistakes by getting caught in overwhelm and losing sight of my goals, dreams and purpose.  The amazing thing I have learned is that even after really challenging moments, everything works out in our favor in the long run.  In the midst of chaos it appears that our world is caving in around us but after all the dust settles, we evolve and life is better.

     

    Think about a stressful moment in your past.  Something that felt overwhelming and frustrating in the moment.  Maybe it was a physical injury, a lost job, a break up, a big argument or an illness.  In the heat of the moment you likely got caught up in the stressful feelings making you feel helpless and hopeless.  The effects of this stressful moment can last hours, days, weeks or months.  Trust me I know that some of these obstacles can truly get in our way and make us feel like the world is against us.  I have felt that way plenty of times.  Now think about that same situation after a few months passed.  Things settled and life started to return to normal. Your drive and motivation returned.  And life returned to its typical pace.  And when you reflect on those events, you might notice that everything worked out. But it wasn’t exactly as you planned it. For example, back in November 2019, I had an upset customer throw my life completely off balance.  In the heat of the moment, I was caught in my stressful emotions and felt a deep dread and impending doom.  I was caught in negative emotions and let the stress take over my life for weeks.  During this stressful situation, I felt helpless, hopeless and alone.  And literally in that moment when it all transpired, I was alone.  It all happened when my husband was away with my oldest son.  I was home alone with my youngest.  And I could have been enjoying this fun bonding time with him.  But instead I was dealing with the subconscious self-limiting beliefs that made me spiral into a sense of fear and overwhelm.  I was so stressed and anxious that I completely felt like my world was caving in on me. And I forgot I had 15 years of amazing customer service on my side.  I forgot that everyone has a bad day sometimes.  I forgot that sometimes you can’t please everyone even when you do everything in your power to support them.  I forgot that I am amazing at my job and that my colleagues all new it.  I lost sight of who I am and I lost hope for everything.  And that extreme stress caused sudden emotional shifts and crying fits. And this wasn’t the first or the last intensely stressful situation.

     

    In the heat of the moment, I let stress, anxiety and fear get the best of me. The situation left me feeling drained, exhausted and frustrated on all levels. I was physically drained of energy.  I lost mental focus and productivity.  I was emotionally frustrated and overwhelmed.  The funny thing is that I know better.  I know the power of using your awareness to free your body and mind of negative emotions.  And I teach my clients to use their awareness to take action and get out of these situations.  But everyone makes mistakes, even me. Because the subconscious mind is more powerful than we can imagine.  And I let myself spiral into the old frustrated version of myself.  I lost sight of all the amazing things in my life because I let the stress of that situation get the best of me.  And when stress gets the best of you, it can completely take over your life.  And it did for quite a while, until I began to slowly take charge of my life again.

     

    That challenging moment kept getting in my way as my self-limiting beliefs and negative thoughts took over my mind.  It continued for a few months as I worked through those negative thoughts, feelings and emotions.   And as I dealt with the true root of the problem my awareness and clarity began to unveil itself.  I have always known the root cause of our emotional shifts come from deep in our past experiences.  The emotional turmoil feels like it is the result of the current situation.  But that deep sense of overwhelm and frustration stems from something way in our past that is imbedded in our subconscious mind.  These overwhelming emotions usually stem from our past childhood and adolescent experiences that were never processed or resolved thoroughly.  And I have worked through many but the subconscious mind always needs attention.

     

    I slowly regained my self-confidence, motivation and drive.  But the journey back was dreadful and I know it was my choice to allow that to take place.  I could have responded differently and ended the torment quickly.  Thankfully, my reputation for great customer service, kindness and compassion prevailed.  And that dreadful day slowly disappeared from my mind.  In that moment of intense anxiety, stress and overwhelm; I was stuck in emotions from the past.  I was processing emotions from my childhood as a Special needs child.  Most people don’t realize that I had a Learning Disability.  They can’t believe that a successful Nurse and Educator could possibly have had learning challenges.  But I did and the journey was not easy.  I worked hard to get out of special classes and eventually graduate with honors from High school and college. But my unprocessed emotions from my childhood were hidden far away in my subconscious mind.  I honestly had no memory or recollection of my experiences as a special needs child.  Actually my childhood was all a blur and I know now it is because I was always stuck in the fight or flight response.  I spent most of my life stuck in this dreadful state of overwhelm and my health declined progressively till I took charge in my 30s.  The stress response was always in motion for me creating havoc on my body physically and emotionally. Just to paint a little picture of what stress can do to your body. I had lost half of my hair by my 20s.  I had severe digestive issues that eventually required surgery and multiple prescriptions.  I had chronic pain and numbness that began in High school. And my health was at a point of crisis in my mid 30s.

     

    Now let’s jump back to the experiences with self-limiting beliefs as a special needs child.  I honestly had no recollection of my experiences as a special needs child until the dust settled after the incident in November.  I realized that all those intense emotions had nothing to do with the situation at hand.  But rather my physical and emotional response mirrored my childhood when I was bullied for being different.  I was teased and picked on because it took me longer to take tests.  I was teased because math and reading was harder for me.  I was ridiculed because I was different from everyone else.  I was isolated because I was the girl that had to leave mainstream class to go to several special classes during the day. I was made fun of because I was bigger and more voluptuous than girls my age.  I was under so much stress due to this emotional turmoil and frustration that I had completely blocked most of my childhood memories.  As a means of protection my mind literally shut down and hid most of my childhood memories, even the good ones.

     

    A few weeks after issue in November, the dust settled and life came back to normal. My career was intact and my overwhelming emotions had resolved.  And as families reached out to me for support to help their special needs children with anxiety a huge realization happened within.  And I finally realized bullying was part of my past that I had never recognized or recalled.  And I never would have realized that truth about my past if this challenge wasn’t placed in my path.  That customer through me off course because it was time for me to evolve and grow from that experience.  It was time for me to process the past and let go of those negative feelings that no longer serve me.  And I needed to realize that I had the power to decide if I would let people push my buttons.  I was finally in charge and I didn’t need to allow others to impact my emotional state or drain my energy anymore.  It is ironic because I knew that I needed to set boundaries, I even talk about it in my book, “The Truth about IBS and Anxiety.”  But I didn’t realize I needed to set clear boundaries with everyone including strangers.  It is funny how sometimes you need a slap in the face to wake up and see the clear picture in front of you.  It all worked out in the end and I learned from my mistakes.  But it took a while for the truth of this experience to enter my conscious mind.  And it all happened this week as a much more obvious obstacle came in my way.  And sometimes the challenge is a wakeup call.

     

    This week those pesky negative thoughts were pushing me once again. It all became clear after I literally fell on my butt.  This time it wasn’t an event that made me stumble and fall.  It wasn’t an argument or confrontation.  It was literally an internal fight within my mind that threw me off balance.  Let’s just say it started 20 minutes before the moment I lost my balance and fell on my butt.  And it occurred because I wasn’t practicing what I teach.  I wasn’t transforming the negative voice in my head.  I wasn’t using my awareness to set myself free from the stress.  Instead I was letting the negative voice take over my emotions and creating a sense of hopelessness once again.  Some people might call this negative voice, Chatty Cathy, but I call her Negative Nancy.  Or for the gentlemen I call him Negative Norm.  Let’s just say Negative Nancy was on overdrive in my mind and those thoughts were getting in my way.  And since I wasn’t paying attention, I was about to get a rude awakening. It was time for me to practice what I preach but I wasn’t listening or observing the message. I was falling back into my stress cycle and I needed a wakeup call to see it.  Something had to give for me to see clearly.

     

    And boom the signs were all about to become super clear once everything fell apart.  I stubbed my big toe. My subconscious mind didn’t budge and I kept allowing Negative Nancy to take over.  And as the helplessness grew in my mind, my anxiety began to take over.  My emotions of frustration were building and I was getting grumpy for no apparent reason.  The day had been beautiful, peaceful and relaxing but I was not feeling relaxed at all.  My mind was stuck on negative overdrive for no apparent reason.  The message was going to be very different this time.  And boom I stubbed my pinkie toe with metal.  This bump made me see stars as the sharp pain radiated up my body.  It was so hard there was an instant hematoma.  It hurt so bad I had to breathe deeply to catch my breath.  It took a few minutes to get blood flow back to my head because the pain was overwhelming.   I was seeing black spots as the pain slowly resolved itself.  A few minutes later I realized my toe was bleeding and went to clean it up.  But my negative mind was still at full force and things were about to tumble quickly.

     

    I had no idea that I was going to experience an epiphany as my life flashed before my eyes. I had my right foot on the counter as I tried to clean my pinkie toe. I leaned over to reach for a tissue paper that was just inches away from me. But my body was not stable or balanced.  And suddenly I lost my balance and my life flashed before my eyes.  I tried to grab the toilet and stop the tumble to the floor.  It all happened in super slow motion as I remembered all the other times I had fallen and injured myself over the last 40+ years.  I slowly went down twisting in midair till my butt hit the toilet rim. After the sharp intense thump on my butt and hip I stumbled to the ground.  I laid on the ground for several minutes taking it all in.  I took deep breaths to regain my vision and energy.  It took some deep breathing to relieve the intense sharp pain in my lower back and butt. In this brief moment of breathing and reflecting, I realized that each of these injuries could have been avoided.  All of those events were under my control but I had chosen to let the negative voice take over.  I avoided using my awareness to set me free from the stress and the stress clouded my vision.  It is interesting how life literally needs to throw a curveball for you to see clearly.

     

    I took it all in.  Step by step from the moment I walked out of the car feeling stressed out.  I was worried about something.  And the impending doom made those negative thoughts and emotions go haywire in my brain.  And when your mind goes haywire everything goes off balance.  It literally throws your entire day off balance.  I didn’t realize how powerful the subconscious self-limiting beliefs were until I reflected on the events that had occurred since November.  My anger and negative emotions took over until I felt it in my body.  Yep, that is exactly what happens, when you stub your toe, hit your funny bone, cut your finger, etc.  You are thinking of something that the universe, god or whoever you believe in wants you to stop obsessing over.  To make a point and create a sense of awareness within you something will happen.  And that means an event, accident or confrontation will come into your life to get you to open your eyes and see it.  And hopefully you get the message and stop the negativity and self-loathing.  Hopefully you stop breath and reflect. And wake up and Smell the coffee.  The life events that come into our path are all learning experiences.  And life is great at changing the subject when you are smack in the middle of a stressful situation.

     

    We have all felt extra stress during this quarantine.  As a nurse, I left so many close friends, family and colleagues at the frontline.  It has been devastating to be far away from them when they needed support and love.  Yet, my fear and negative thoughts kept getting in my way.  I let all those negative thoughts stop me from reaching out to them when they needed me most.  And I spent the last few weeks working up my strength and resilience to help those I love most.  And it was my awareness after falling on my butt, that made me realize, this moment is exactly where I am supposed to be.  I was given a gift to share with the world.  And I have been hiding it because of my own insecurities and self-doubt.  I have been hiding because I fear what people will think of my uniqueness.  But the truth is it doesn’t matter.  Because the people I love at the frontline deserve to see the silly side of me.  They deserve to have the funny girl that brings a smile, a joke and inspirational words into their days.  And if that means I get on Camera with a wig and make a funny joke as I teach a relaxation technique then so be it. So after falling on my butt, I realized that my uniqueness can inspire others to use their awareness to set themselves free from the turmoil within.  And I was inspired to create a unique experience for my friends and colleagues at the frontline.  So I created a video teaching some simple relaxation techniques wearing one of my wigs. So the moral of this story is get up and get out of your own way.  The world is sending me challenges and obstacles for you to evolve into the person you dream.  Sitting at the sidelines doesn’t serve anyone. So get up and get moving.  Your awareness and action can set you free from the stress that lies within.

    Categories dancing, emotional release, motivation, Physical Pain, positivity, stress relief

    Dance Release

    Have you ever felt stressed out and overwhelmed?  Have you ever felt anxious? Have your feelings made you feel stuck, unmotivated and unproductive? Have you ever felt trapped in your body? Have you ever felt trapped in your life?

    I have felt every one of those stressful situations above.  If you answered yes to one or all, know that you are not alone.  I have been there many times in my life.  Challenges and obstacles place added stress into our lives and often make those feelings and emotions arise.  The problem lies when those intense emotions stay for prolonged periods and keep you feeling hopeless, helpless and alone.  My journey to healing was not easy and it took me 7 years to figure out the true ways to Manifest health, happiness and joy.  But the beautiful secret that I unveiled is that it doesn’t have to be that difficult or complex.  Finding your own unique self-loving routine can expedite and facilitate that journey.  And dance is one of my little secrets that I know many people resonate with.  Trust me I am not a professional dancer.  I don’t follow choreography well or know much about professional dance at all.  This is not about professional dance but rather following the rhythm of your own emotions and body to release the pain within you.

    Energetic release is one of the little secrets I share in my programs and books.  And it all begins with music, dancing and vocals.  And it can easily happen anytime and anywhere.  And you have everything you need to do this right now.  You have your body, your voice and music.  And that is all it takes to release negative emotions from your body with the power of music.  I have always loved to dance.  Feeling the vibrations inside my body is a phenomenal experience that flows through me like fire.  Swaying my hips to the beat is relaxing as I listen to the music and process the powerful words and beats within my body.  Connecting with the message in the words is cathartic as you tap into your own pain and use the flow to let go of those emotions that don’t serve you. And the sound of the music melts my stress away as I use my body to flow releasing the tension and stress from my muscles.  But simple process and realization didn’t come easy.  I had lost my connection to my passion for music and dancing long ago. It was phenomenal to see the shifts in my body as the stress melted away.  But like most amazing things in our life we get caught in the hustle and bustle forgetting the things that bring us joy.  And that is exactly what happened with me over the years as chronic illness developed. And slowly but surely we lose the habits and activities that bring us joy because commitments, stress, responsibilities and excuses get in the way.  Then suddenly you have stopped all your fun and nurturing activities getting stuck in the mundane life of responsibilities. It creeps up on you and suddenly you stopped exercising, you no longer go out with friends, and you get stuck in a new pattern and way of life that doesn’t nurture your sould.

    This realization didn’t come easy.  And it took me to a painful place I know all too well, rock bottom.  I am sure you have been there too.  Many of us have hit rock bottom at different times in our lives.  Rock bottom is a place I have lingered at many times with emotional shifts and chronic illness.  I went through a really stressful and difficult experience in November 2019 that made me tumble and fall hard into past trauma.  I experienced pain, exhaustion, headaches, stress and intense emotional shifts.  Much like the stress everyone is experiencing right now during this pandemic, I felt trapped and overwhelmed.  That internal stress experience reemerged during this pandemic as confinement progressed.  The external stressors we experience create havoc inside our bodies as inflammation and stress accumulates inside our bodies.  And this pandemic has proven that the stress can be debilitating and overwhelming for many.

    Back in November the stressful experience caused me to feel trapped and helpless inside my own body.  I had experienced a situation at work that triggered past trauma and torment my life.  The stress caused me to lose sight of all the mindfulness practices I share with others and I was unable to practice what I preach.  It made me fearful, scared and lonely.  As I reflect now, on the events that transpired that day I know it was my perception that caused my downfall.  The situation itself was not life threatening or life altering.  The situation truly shouldn’t have taken over my life but it did. And it happened because my perception of the situation made me think and feel it was a life or death situation.  My body went into fight or flight and the stress response stuck around for months.  It was a torturous journey over the past few months to get back into my rhythm slowly incorporating strategies to reduce stress and calm my nervous system.  The event actually made me completely lose track of all the easy stress relief strategies I teach, like dancing.  And I completely forgot all about myself in the process.  I had to slowly pick up the pieces and tackle that trauma at the root. It took me months of slow progress, patience and perseverance to dig myself out of the hole.   Thankfully the torturous process brought me to an enlightenment and realization that self-care and self-love needs to be a priority.  And this is true for everyone no matter what circumstances are around you. One of the little tricks I use in my arsenal of alternative therapies is dance.  And I use it often, sometimes multiple times a day to shift my energy, vibrations and emotional state.

    Music and dance are healing modalities that I use often transform the way I feel in stressful situations.  And the beauty of music, dance and singing is free.  You can turn on the radio and dance anytime you feel the beat inside you.  You can pop in your ear buds and dance anywhere.  And I actually do that all the time.  I am the mom that sways to her own beat and dances while her kids play.  I don’t sit at the sidelines while the kids practice, I take advantage of my extra time and use it wisely.  But if I could lose sight of the things that bring me joy into my life anyone can.  Music brings freedom as you connect with the beat and powerful words throughout your body.  It is so easy to find songs on the web now with you-tube, pandora, spotify and other stations.  There are so many variations of music that people can explore to find songs and genres they truly enjoy.  So I invite you to turn on that special song.  Don’t worry who is looking or what they are thinking.  Don’t let fear get in your way of having fun and releasing stress.  Use your body and let the music flow through you.

    Music and dance are powerful tools and you can truly reduce stress and emotions when you use it.  Just feel the music as you sway to the beat.  Listen to the words and feel them in your body.  Tap into your bodies healing potential as you process and release those emotions.  This amazing healing tool happens with all types of music.  Use the music to release the stress from your body as you sway to the beat. Use the power of dance slowly swaying to the beat alone or with a partner.  Feel the deep connection that arises within you as you sway back and forth following the flow of your body.  Make dancing more fun and healing by creating a community.  Have a virtual or live dance party with your friends or family.  Music is healing and transformative for all generations.  Everyone can enjoy the power of healing through music anytime and anywhere.  So the next time your favorite song comes on embrace it and go for it.  You don’t need to be in the privacy of your home to enjoy the beat deeply within your body.  Pump up the volume at the next stop light and dance to the beat as you wait.  Pop in your ear buds and jiggle to the beat as you wait for your kids at practice.  Take a bathroom break at work and dance the stress away on your break.  The beauty of energetic release is that you can do it anytime and anywhere using the music you love.  So use it and don’t lose sight of the music that brings you joy.  And if you ever feel stressed out, overwhelmed or anxious take a break, pump up the music and feel that beat.  I guarantee the music will melt your stress away.   You might need a few songs to feel it but just go with the flow and let your body guide you.  You have the power within you to release your stress and music just makes it fun and invigoration.

    Categories Anxiety, autoimmune, Emotional pain, Health, motivation, Physical Pain, Transformation

    Keep Your Head Up!

    I woke up this morning with a song playing in my head.  As the words played, I remembered that everything is always evolving for the greater good.  The music playing in my head is all a beautiful sign that my day is starting off in alignment with my bright, intuitive, positive and creative nature.  Trust me it has been difficult for me too.  I may not be working at the bedside as an RN because my chronic illness and autoimmune disease lead me to a different role but I still experience plenty of stress.  I am the lucky nurse that calls families with Covid-19 results.  I am the special person that was chosen to give the news weather good or bad to families.  And trust me those calls can be difficult, stressful and challenging.  But my resilience and mindful practices support me so that I can be strong and support the families in the community.

    Life tends to through us plenty of obstacles.  Even with all the mindful activities that I practice and my perseverance, some days are harder than others.  And one of the things that seem to disappear when I am stressed is my creativity and writing.  Most people don’t realize this little secret because they see me on social media and assume that everything is perfect.  I used to write on this blog consistently before the spring of 2019.  But over the past year stress, challenges and obstacles kept throwing me off track.  And even though I was writing a little and publishing books, I still felt frozen and stuck.  And this phenomenon can happen for all of us on a regular day but now in the midst of a pandemic the stress is heightened. Trust me those days that I have to call a patient with a positive result aren’t easy.  But my unique stress reduction techniques propel me forward and help me stay healthy, happy and positive.  And it is essential because if I fall apart then everything around me will fall apart too.  If I make that phone call feeling sad, gloomy and upset – the families will feel it too.  And if the families I call feel it on the phone – imagine what my family feels as we are all confined in our homes.

    Stress and overwhelm reaches everyone you come into contact with and everyone you love.  You may not realize that the way you feel impacts those around you but it absolutely does.  Yesterday, I had a weird day, I wasn’t stressed or anxious but I didn’t feel connected to my creativity or productivity.  I wasn’t my typical fun and creative self.  I usually incorporate some fun creativity in the day for Lucas but I didn’t.  I usually plan an art project, game or science project.  These activities give us time for bonding, laughing, creativity and fun.  But yesterday I didn’t do any of that.  And Lucas spent all day entertaining himself which resulted in anxiety and sensory overload before bed.  And it resulted in him having anxiety and difficulty sleeping.

    The biggest secret I learned in my journey overcoming chronic illness and debilitating pain is that it is crucial to tackle the emotional and physical root simultaneously.  And the emotional stress is the most complex.  It is essential to shift the negative thoughts in the subconscious mind and staying positive.  And during this Pandemic Crisis it is absolutely crucial to stay positive and optimistic.  When we fail to see the positive in our days it makes us stay frozen, fearful and stuck.  This pandemic has been difficult for all of us.  But the beautiful gift is that there is a reason for everything, even this crisis.  And there is always sunshine after the storm.  The gift we have all received from this quarantine is more quality and quantity time for bonding and connecting with those we love. We all have more time to be with our children.  We all have more time to call up a friend and say hello.  We all have more time to video chat with extended family.  We all have more time to sit outdoors and meditate.  We all have more time to exercise and take time for ourselves.  But if we get stuck in the negative thoughts and distractions we can’t appreciate the positive gifts we have received.

    Staying positive during the difficult times can be easier than you think.  Somedays might feel super complicated and impossible to overcome.  Trust me I have had some pretty horrible days over the past few years.  I have had days that made me want to curl up in bed and stay there.  I have had days filled with physical pain.  I have had days filled with sadness and frustration.  I have had days that made me feel like crying constantly.  But I pushed through them because I knew that staying in that negative space would only make things worse.  And I knew every new day is always a fresh start.  And with a fresh start comes a new outlook. And with a new outlook comes new possibilities.  Sometimes it is hard to remember the sunshine will come out tomorrow.  Trust me I completely understand.  These days have been difficult for me too.  But if you keep your head up, stay positive and shift that subconscious mind anything is possible.

    Like the song says, we have to stay in the positive, keep your head up and stop worrying.  The secret to manifesting your wellness is to stay focused on your goal and stay positive.  If we allow the stress to overcome us and live in fear then Covid-19 wins.  Somedays are harder to feel relaxed, calm, peaceful and healthy.  But the secret is remembering there is always a rainbow after the rainstorm.  There is always sunshine tomorrow if you shift those thoughts and stay positive. Tomorrow is always a fresh start to achieve your dreams.  The obstacles, challenges and this pandemic is only a bump in the road. The sunshine will come again if you breath, relax and stay positive.

    Today is a fresh start to embrace the beauty and gifts around us. Are your ready to Manifest your own Wellness?  Do you want to stay Positive during this pandemic? Do you want to Thrive?  You can manifest your own wellness and stay positive.  If I can manifest wellness inside a body filled with autoimmune disease and genetic predispositions than anyone can. And you can manifest wellness now even amidst a pandemic. So, are your ready to stay Positive? Do you want someone to motivate you to stay positive? Then check out this exclusive program to support you during this crisis.

    Manifest Wellness with Diane

    Thanks Andy Grammer for waking me up with your beautiful song.  The song that played was You gotta Keep Your Head Up! 

    Categories autoimmune, autoimmune crisis, Biohacking, Chronic Pain, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, Emotional pain, Empath, Fear, Fibromyalgia, Inflammation, kids, Mommy, motivation, Physical Pain, positivity, Speak your mind

    A Pandemic Within

    In the light of this new life stress and pandemic crisis, I realize that God was preparing me for this very moment in time.  Over the past 2 years, I have been evolving and learning to deal with my constant stress state. Most people don’t realize the constant stress and anxiety that I have been living in my whole life.  And the case is the same for anyone with a chronic health issues, genetic disease or chronic illness.  I never thought that I would be sharing my story of triumph over a debilitating genetic condition but here I am.  I never thought that I could learn to relax and release stress to reduce my physical symptoms, pain and stress but here I am.  I never thought that I could support others to deal with stress, illness, digestive issues and grief but here I am.  And this past year, I have done that and more.  And I never thought that I would use my techniques to help me deal with the stress of claustrophobia in a pandemic, and yet here I am.

    Most people don’t realize that my body has been under constant stress since childhood.  Most people don’t realize that their stress reaches their children.  Most people don’t realize that to truly tackle stress and calm the nervous system you need to address the subconscious mind.   We all have a Negative Nancy or Negative Norm with in our minds.  But there is power in transforming those negative thoughts into the positive.  Trust me I was a skeptic at first.  Shit I have been pushing through my negative thoughts and fears for years.  I push through them everyday to write an article, post a video or be my authentic self.  But the beautiful gift I learned in the process is that working on your Negative Nancy and Negative Norm actually impacts everyone around you.  Have you ever noticed when you enter a room with a Super Negative person, your mood completely plummets?  Have you ever noticed that when a high energy happy friend calls you, your energy and mood skyrockets?

    Well the same thing happens inside YOUR home.  If you are stressed, anxious and overwhelmed your children feel it.  If you are stressed, anxious and overwhelmed your family feels it.  If you are stressed out your customers, colleagues, partners and the world around you feels it.  It isn’t hard to shift that Negative voice but it does take a little time and effort.  And in the midst of this crisis we all have extra time to evolve and grow in our stress reduction practices.  We all have more time inside our homes.  We all have more time with those we love.  And to truly value that time and soak in the delicious goodness of these quiet times we need to go within.  Trust me I am beyond scared to have to wear that Hazmat suit and care for patients.  But I am ready for the task.  I was brought to this world to help people who are ill, anxious, stressed and overwhelmed.  And I know it because that has been my life experiences up until now.  I have become an autoimmune warrior, chronic pain survivor, chronic illness guru, digestive health prophet and so much more.  And it was all preparing me to help others in this time of great stress and anxiety.

    Trust me I have been avoiding my gifts for a long time.  I have been too scared to share videos of meditations and hypnosis.  I have been to scared to show the world that you can truly transform your stress and impact those around you.  But I learned this special fact at home.  Over the past year, I published a book, The Truth about IBS and Anxiety, and in that time I also wrote a children’s book to help my son with anxiety, sensory overload and stopping the stress response.  And the book has been sitting in my computer because I was too scared to show the world the truth.  And now in this moment of extreme stress I realize the injustice I am doing by not being authentic.  So today, I will finally get out of my own way and share my gifts and secrets in a special Support Group for this Crisis.  I will share simple bonding and stress relief techniques for mom’s to reduce their stress and support their children.  The strategies I teach have astounded my physicians, they have no idea how I have been able to stop my frequent infections, pain, migraines, chronic lung issues and more…  They are completely surprised because this is not something that is taught in nursing or medical school.  This practice is something I learned by going within and learning my own body using the scientific background from my nursing career to hack my immune system and nervous system.  Yesterday, my colleague and the founder of the non-profit Family Friendly Hands, came to me asking for a live to support families.  Trust me I was scared shitless to share my gifts and story on social media, yet here I am.  And yesterday, I recorded a healing audio on Facebook despite my own internal stress and resistance.  And today, in the midst of all the chaos and stress, I will go LIVE with Elsa Murguia Clarke to support the community and families with special needs children. And I will continue to push through my fears and anxieties to support the community with COVID-19 inside the Hospital and Outside.  Why?  Because inside the Hospital my role is to support families as they receive these results positive or negative.  And in the community my role is to help people slow down their nervous system, boost their immune system and release stress.

    This is a vital role I play because the ones that are impacted the most by our stress is our children. Trust me I didn’t want to believe it either.  But I lived a life of chronic illness, anxiety and digestive issues.  And it all began in my childhood.  As an empath, I was born with special gifts to sense stress in those around me.  And many of our special needs children and regular children have the same gifts.  And our stress reaches all of them.  Let me tell you a story, when I was a little girl my mom was always under stress, she had chronic illness, chronic pain and anxiety.  And the days she saw her mom the stress would multiply because her mom was a Negative Nancy.  I love my grandma but the fact is she didn’t know how to cope with her predominantly negative mind and it impacted her physical health.  Well that stress and tension crossed the generations to me.  And I have been learning to deal with those special empathic gifts over the past 7 years.  And finally, I am ready to teach people that you can reduce stress, improve your mood, calm your nervous system and boost your immune system.  And I know it because I proven it at home, with my children and with my clients.  So if you want to learn to calm and relax in the midst of this chaos, join the movement I am creating inside my support group.  I’m here to support you through this stress. Join my free Facebook group Unleash Your Inner Strength to an exclusive video I will share today, The proof your kids feel your stress.

     

     

     

    Categories Anxiety, Chronic Pain, Emotional pain, Empath, Empathy, fatigue, Fear, flare up, Fulfillment, Health, hope, Human Needs, motivation, Physical Pain, positivity, self-actualization, Self-doubt, Speak your mind

    An Empathic Awekening

    What is empathy?  Empathy is a sense of understanding the feelings and experiences of another person.   Many of us are empathetic towards our friends, coworkers or family members experiences.  And we have some form of empathy this sense of every day in conversations or communication with others.  We may even experience empathy watching a movie, TV show or listening to a song.  There are many unique individuals that choose to live a life of empathy and service to others.  Those special individuals live a life of service in one form or another to better the lives of the world around them.  They often choose their profession because of their high sense of empathy and compassion towards others.  These loving individuals in the health care or service profession experience more empathic situations than others do because of their work environment.  For example, my profession healthcare (nurses, doctors, EMT, Medical Assistants, Fire fighters, etc.) experience much more empathy because their career choice is founded on helping others.  Every day they care for patients facing health challenges and they serve them in their role.  Each of their patients is facing unique experiences that involve some form of physical or emotional pain.  The healthcare workers role is empathic in and of itself, simply by their conscious decision to help others.  Many health care workers may experience added stress or health issues because of their career choice and the way they process these experiences.

    And yet there are still people that experience an extreme sense of empathy.  This highly exclusive gift is almost impossible for others to understand.  They experience empathy at a cellular level throughout their entire body.  You can’t imagine feeling this form of empathy unless you experience it first-hand.  Those enlightened individuals are empath’s and they feel exponentially more than everyone around them.  Empath’s are individuals with a gift of hypersensitivity.  Some may call it a curse but I call it a gift.  Of course to reach this point of awareness and acceptance was quite a journey for me and those around me.   Empath’s are hypersensitive to the feelings, thoughts, pains and emotions of others.  That little fact was even hard for me to understand even-though I had an intuitive feeling lingering in my mind for a long time.  The interesting fact is that many empaths (hypersensitive people) don’t even realize the extent of their empathy or the toll it can take on their own health.  For instance my career paths have always lead me to a trajectory of caring for others in various roles and environments.  My careers gradually transitioned and transformed from one career into the next in the service realm.   Every career choice was a compassionate one: Special Education Teacher, Nursing Assistant, Registered Nurse, Health Coach, Hypnotist and now Transformational Author.  These are all careers based on supporting the community by nurturing, caring, and loving others.  All of these career choices were based on love and a hope to make a difference.  They were each an opportunity to improve the lives of those around me.  I acknowledged my empath gift a few years ago but didn’t understand its true impact.  I had NO idea the significant role it played in my own emotional and physical wellbeing.  I had seen a rollercoaster decline in my health and happiness but had no idea my empathic gift was the culprit.  And truly it wasn’t the culprit at ALL now that I understand my gift.  The cause of my health decline was my lack of understanding and preparation to live with my special gift.  After all we may be born empathic but the cultivation of a deep connection with Your Inner Strength takes time.  It was my lack of knowledge that caused me to fail at meeting my own basic human needs.  It was a lack of self-loving, self-care practices that was my downfall.  It was my lack of knowledge about self-protection that truly opened my eyes.

    Imagine a person that is so open and willing to help others every second of everyday.  They are so willing that they do this subconsciously all day long, 365 days a year, over and over again.  And I mean in the moment and every moment.  It could be a text message, phone call, face to face conversation or care-giver relationship.  You name the situation and my body was ready to tackle it. And I had no idea it was happening for almost 38 years.  I was effortlessly absorbing feelings, thoughts, emotions, pain and experiences of those around me.   I absolutely mean absorb because that is what empaths do.    And that is exactly what I used to do every day.  I was completely oblivious and unaware it was happening.  I did it with patients, complete stranger, friends, family members, co-worker, etc. It didn’t matter who it was if they were in pain I was ready to fix them or give them a little relief.  The true awakening began when I noticed TV shows and movies triggered intense feelings.

    Hypersensitive people are extremely sensitive to the energetic vibrations, emotions, thoughts and feelings of others.  This weird phenomena can actually allow them to absorb the feelings, thoughts and emotions of others into their bodies.  I know it sounds crazy because until I experienced it for myself I thought it was a crazy too.  Then I started to feel intense emotions during movies and TV shows.  The most significant experiences I had were watching Game of Thrones or other violent shows.  And the most traumatic scenes in the first few episodes of Game of Thrones were the hardest for me to handle. I could feel the good, the bad and the ugly.  I could feel everything as if it was happening to me.  I could see the pain in Kalisi’s eyes as her new husband raped her.  I could feel her pain when her brother treated her like garbage.  It wasn’t always negative or bad.  I felt the good ones too.  I could feel her love transform into something new for her husband.  And when I say feel, I mean my heart would race, my blood would boil, the emotions would pop into my head and fill my entire body. I could feel her fear; her shame and it took a lot of work to be able to watch the few episodes that I did.  We tried to watch it years ago but it was too violent and at that point I hadn’t established a self-love routine.  This past year we tried to watch it again and every time those rough and tough emotions came up I practiced my own routine on the couch amidst the chaotic show.  Yep, I changed my breathing pattern, I chanted affirmations in my mind, I practiced my stretching and relaxation techniques to release those emotions that had entered me.  It was an exhausting process and eventually we stopped watching the show.  I truly thought it was an amazing show but it was a lot of work to stay relaxed and calm because I hadn’t learned how to protect myself yet.

    After this phenomena, I was more aware of feelings and emotions in my body.  I started to feel weird sensations in my body during conversations with friends, coworkers and family members.  I began experiencing pain in areas that had been pain free for years.  Random pains would emerge once again.  Sometimes the pain would vanish after some self-love routines and others would last for days or even weeks.  You see I still hadn’t learned a crucial element to prevent or limit this phenomenon.  And truly this little crucial element is beneficial to everyone not only empaths because it promotes your own resiliency by building your own inner strength.

    Have you ever had a conversation and suddenly your head hurts?  Or Your shoulders tense up?  or  You get a sharp pain in your stomach?  Once, I started to put things together and realize this was my reality I began to ask myself questions.  Why does my back hurt?  What is the message my body is sending?  Suddenly, I started to ask myself a lot of questions.  This little practice began several months ago.  I began to see patterns with friends, family and strangers.  I realized that many pains that arouse in my body were not mine: back pain, shoulder pain or headache.  I’m not sure if they experienced any relief but suddenly after the conversation ended, I had their pain too.  Some might say its psychological, you are imagining it but I wasn’t.  They didn’t tell me they were in pain, I wasn’t assessing them as a nurse does, yet boom it came.  Then later on in the day they would mention they had a headache or their right shoulder hurt and it confirmed what my intuition had already told me.  And when I say I had pain I mean it.  My muscles were tight and tender, I was less flexible.  My muscles would making popping and snapping noises and activities became harder to perform.   Let’s just say the things I had worked so hard to relieve started pilling back up again.  My arm pain or back pain would be debilitating once again.

    It would happen suddenly in the middle of a conversation, my neck suddenly tightened and tensed up causing a radiating pain.  Then I would take some time to meditate, breath and relax.  I would ask myself.  Is this my pain mine or someone else’s? Boom, a name would pop into my head.  Then I would think about the conversation and any visual cues I had received.  Maybe the person was rubbing their neck or told me they had a headache.  I usually didn’t know they were in pain during the conversation.  Mysteriously symptoms would arise all the time out of absolutely thin air.  It helped me understand a little more why working bedside in the Pediatric Emergency Room was so difficult for me.  Being such a loving person and trying to heal the pain of those beautiful little children had eventually taken a toll so huge that I had to leave them behind.   But I hadn’t figured this out until now.   And I left bedside nursing more than 9 years ago because I left when my oldest was little.  You see I have been taking care of myself for years already and my chronic pain is pretty much non-existent.  I literally had to give up bedside care because my body couldn’t take it and my doctor was worried I was going to die if it continued.  Fast forward to this year, I am aware that I can feel these intense emotions and am creating a routine to relax and calm but I’m still missing a key element protection.  I get flare ups here and there but the extent of my pain is never close to what it was 6 or 7 years ago.  Then I travel to Hawaii with my family.  People that I love more than anything in the world.  People that I would give my life for and obviously if I absorb the pain of strangers my body was open and ready to take on their pain too.  Traveling in a group is always stressful.  We all know that it’s hard to please everyone and I always try to please everyone.  So I did, I used my ho’oponopono and my self-loving practices blessing everyone in my family.  I blessed them all every single one of them all day long.  If there was a family argument I blessed them.  If the kids were fighting I blessed them.  If we couldn’t agree on a tour, I blessed them.  If we were in a car for a long time and tension was running high, I blessed them.  I thought I was helping myself in the process that the blessings would help me remain peaceful, calm and protected.  They helped me stay peaceful and calm but I definitely wasn’t protected.  Each day I was exhausted and drained.  I would fall asleep early and wake up exhausted.  I didn’t realize I was missing some crucial steps in my process until I returned from Hawaii and read a book that arrived as a gift from my Publisher. Ramses Rodriguez’s book “Stop Pressing Your Own Panic Button” opened my eyes to my gift.  It also brought to light a doctor that has my special gift.  She has dedicated her career to help people understand their gift and protect themselves. Dr. Judith Orloff wrote the “The Empath’s Survival Guide” really opened my eyes.  I began to listen to her book on audible and them progressed to purchasing her program for additional insight.  And suddenly it all made sense, the exhaustion and the desire to rush home early from Paradise.  By the end of my trip to Hawaii, I was exhausted, drained and overwhelmed.  The lack of protection for myself caused me to feel completely overwhelmed and snappy.  I was snapping at people, grumpy and making hasty decisions because I just couldn’t take any more stress.  I had spent the entire trip blessing everyone around me and had lost myself.  I had lost my happy, positive attitude and upbeat personality.  I was at complete exhaustion and the only thing I could think about was getting home.  I still oblivious of my true gifts and the impact it was having on my own health.  I hadn’t developed a protection routine for myself because I didn’t know I needed one.  I was still taking on the emotions, thoughts, pains and energies of everyone around me even though I didn’t want to. And thus my Empath awakening happened. It has been a few weeks since we returned from that spectacular trip that enlightened me to the true powers of my gifts.  It also helped me realize the importance of creating a routine for myself that truly gave me resilience and happiness.  The funny thing I learned along the way is these little routines that I have are not only beneficial to me but everyone around me.  This week a course came into my email at Baptist called “Highly Resilient Nurses” that cemented this little fact in my mind.  The course spoke of some of the practices I have developed for myself over the past few years.  My practice is still significantly different than anything I have encountered out in the world.  But I realize now that I am on the right path and that Hawaii was the trip that brought my true awakening to light.  After all we all need to fall to stand up again.  We all need to crawl to walk.  We all need to hurt to heal.  So now it’s time to write the Transformation book I was born to write.

     

    So Here is a little gift.  I created it for all those empath’s out there.  Those Special people like me that feel more than the rest.  Those people that have a unique gift and were born to help the world around them.  And maybe even live in the health care world like I do.  Take time for yourself to listen and relax before you begin your day.  Create a sense of protection for yourself every morning.  This practice of self-love will make your day Fabulous.  Blessings and Joy to all of you. Click the image below to list to the Meditation.

    Morning Meditation
    Empathic Awakening
    Categories Fear, Fulfillment, kids, motivation, self-actualization

    Rappel Adventure

    The best day in Hawaii was definitely our Rappel day in Maui.  It was our only alone time together during our family vacation.  We spent the day laughing and pushing our limits in the Forest.  It was a very peaceful day with the boys.  By far this quiet and adventurous day in Maui was a bonding experience for all of us.  It was just us and two other guests on the tour that day.  The Rappel venue was in a picturesque and peaceful landscape in Maui.  It was a an amazing picturesque drive through the windy two lane highway up the mountain coast towards Hana.  We enjoyed ourselves learning about the history of Maui during the car ride up to the venue.  The road was impressive with only two lanes following the twists and turns of the mountain side.  The views were spectacular with beautiful scenery all the way to the Rappel site.  We enjoyed the conversations and adventures with our tour guides and fellow guests.  This spectacular adventure with Rappel Maui was an enlightening experience.  It was a quiet day of bonding and adventure for our little family.  We enjoyed quiet time in the lush landscapes of Maui.  Kate and Chris were very knowledgeable and experienced tour guides.  We felt safe the entire time we walked through the forest and Rappel down the waterfalls.  Lucas is a rock climber here in Miami and the Rappel tour was an adventure aligned with his passion.  Gabriel enjoyed the experience too.  It wasn’t any easy task to maneuver.  It tests you physically and mentally to put all your trust your skills in such an intense environment.  I have never tried an adventure like this before.  I rock climb occasionally in Miami but it isn’t the easiest task for me.  It can be scary to trust the safety equipment and let go of your fears.  Standing at the top of the cliffs is an enlightening and scary experience.  Standing at the edge of the cliff looking down tests your mind and body.   Fear can easily set in if you allow it to take over.  Thankfully my sense of adventure and resilience kept me calm and relaxed.   I was excited to push my own limits because the old me never would have been able to accomplish this physically and mentally intense adventure.  The old me never would have attempted such a challenging tour because chronic pain and illness had left me with limited strength and physical abilities.  I knew this tour was a test of my physical and mental resilience from the moment I booked it.  I worked hard to regain my physical strength over the past 6 years to push my limits in Hawaii.  Before the first climb I was talking to Luis one of the guests about the significance of this tour for me.  I told him the old me 6 years ago would never have been able to physically deal with the challenges of this tour.  I worked hard to regain my mobility, flexibility and overcome my chronic pain.  It was a huge accomplishment in my life and this tour was truly going to tackle those last little fears I was holding.  Hawaii had a bunch of adventurous tours and my journey had brought me here to finally prove to my subconscious that I am strong, powerful and ready for anything. I was truly ready for it all.  Ready to tackle the physical and mental tasks the tour would bring.  The first fear was trusting the equipment and allowing myself to lean into it.  My first Rappel landed me on my stomach on a cushion as I mastered this little task.  But I got up quickly and climbed down ready to tackle the waterfalls.  The equipment was all set up and everyone was securely tied throughout our walk and Rappel through the forest.  When we arrived at the first waterfall things really started to get real.  It was a spectacular view of the forest and top of the waterfall.  We each took our turns slowly Rappelling down the cliff.  I was super calm and relaxed as I watched Gabriel begin his first waterfall.  I didn’t expect what happened next but I knew that he was safe.  I also knew that I was strong and capable of keeping calm and relaxed through it all.  Gabriel slipped at the top of the waterfall briefly.  He was tied up laying on top of the waterfall with his feet dangling of the cliffs edge.  I knew the equipment was safe and secure.  Chris was next to him the entire time talking and guiding him through it.  I trusted his expertise to get Gabriel (my baby) out of his predicament.  None the less it was still a scary experience watching Gabriel dangle at the edge of the waterfall.  I took a deep breath and focused on my inner calm as I watched Gabriel get back up and secure his stance again.  I continued to breath as he Rappelled down the waterfall.  My heart was racing as I watched Gabriel regain his footing and push his limits safely down the cliff.  I kept myself calm and centered through the experience but I’m sure the fear was evident in my face.  Once he was safely at the bottom it was time for Lucas to follow in his path.  My little Lucas had waited months for this little adventure.  I could see the excitement in his eyes as he began his descent down the waterfall.  He is a tiny little guy but strong and adventurous.  He enjoyed every moment of the tour to the fullest.  It was equally scary watching my little bundle of joy Rappel down the mountain but he did it effortlessly with a huge smile.  Then it was my turn.  It was time to test my physical and mental resilience to the fullest.  My first cliff Rappel experience wasn’t easy but I was determined to go down the waterfall safely and efficiently.  I used my own breathing and centering techniques while I pushed my physical limits.  I slowly and meticulously pushed my butt back secured my stance and climbed slowly down the watery rocks.  It was intense and I didn’t want to look down.  Looking up at the photographer was scary too but I rocked it!!! The tour guides actually told me that I smoothly Rappelled down the waterfalls better than the boys did.  Kate and Chris could hear my breathing and told me they liked it.  I was actually using self-hypnosis, positive self-talk and breath work throughout the whole descent down the cliff.  I’ve become comfortable with my weird breathing patterns and don’t worry what others think about it.  It didn’t matter to me if others were listening or thought I was weird.  The slow deep breaths kept me focused and calm during the adventurous tour.  I used different techniques throughout the day.  Sometimes people can notice and sometimes they can’t. I’ve learned to honor the way I feel and do what I need regardless of the views the world may have of me.  Honestly most of the time people don’t notice or care much about what you do.  We tend to worry about these things excessively for no reason.  It was a spectacular day immersed in the forest of Maui.  We enjoyed the peace and quiet as we watched each other Rappel.  We jumped into the cool spring water after each waterfall.  The boys saw crayfish and shrimp in the water pools.  It was by far the best day in Hawaii.  We experienced thrills and excitement while be bonded together.  It was amazing to spend a quiet day alone in nature with my boys.  I will remember Maui forever.

     

    Categories Fulfillment, Human Needs, motivation, self-actualization

    Happiness is Achievable…

    Happiness is achievable in Life.  It is possible to Thrive and Feel Amazing in your daily life.  The path to Happiness starts with our basic human needs.  I’m sure your remember Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs.  We learned this little concept over and over again throughout our Educational lives.  But did you really take time to think about it.  Are you meeting all of your needs for Self-Actualization?  Probably not.  Most people never meet this level of fulfillment which makes it difficult to reach true Happiness.  The first 3 levels are the building blocks of a Happy life and most people achieve those three essential areas.  We usually meet our physiological needs (food, water, warmth and rest).  Although not all foods are created equal and rest can be difficult for some people.  Our need for safety and security are usually met if we feel safe in our home and work environment.  Belonging and love is achieved with relationships that nurture and support you with love.  The top two levels are a little more complicated to achieve for most people.  The reason its difficult to achieve or maintain is we all have subconscious beliefs from our past that block us from these two stages: Esteem needs and Self-actualization.

    Why is it so complicated to meet Self-fulfillment? Think about it this way.  You are an amazing professional career and feel loved and supported at home.  Yet for some reason most days you feel like something is missing.  You want to do more with your life and feel your true purpose hasn’t happened yet.  You might not understand why these feelings continue to arise but they appear frequently.  Your mind throws you curveballs every day with negative thought and insecurities.  These beliefs are usually related to experiences in your past and rarely coincide with the way you truly feel.  They don’t resonate with your deepest desires, passions and dreams for your life.  That is exactly why… You feel stuck.   Stuck in a job you don’t find fulfilling.  Trapped in relationships that don’t nurture your growth and development.  Therefore you are stuck and you aren’t able to reach the top of your pyramid.  And the pressure trickles down into the other areas you already achieved.  You begin to realize that certain relationships aren’t as nurturing as you used to think.  You start to realize that some groups or people make you feel sad or off center.  This shifts into emotional state impact your sense of safety.  Thus the journey begins.  You begin to surround yourself with people that truly bring you happiness and joy.  You decrease connections with people that are negative or unsupportive and feel a little better.   The relationship shifts help you regain your safety and sense of belonging.  But ahhh.. You are stuck again.  Its all because our minds were programed in our childhood.  We were programmed with feelings and beliefs from our family, friends and ancestors.  These programmed beliefs that don’t resonate deep inside us create a shift in our needs and the way we feel.  Why?  Because your mind does’t truly believe that you are meeting your psychological and self-fulfillment needs.  It means that YOU have a huge potential to SHIFT and THRIVE.   That’s Right… Your mind is sending you messages through your thoughts and feelings to Push you to Change.  That is the power of the human mind.  The fact that your mind isn’t completely happy actually resonates in your body.  You may not even realize the connection but it is there.  We actually develop tenderness, pain and symptoms as our body tries to push you to take ACTION.

    Here is an example:  Your Boss comes to you with a project that needs to be done ASAP.  A sense of overwhelm creeps up on you.  Your face gets flush.  Your shoulder and necks muscles tighten.  You feel pressure in your chest.  You want to scream but its not appropriate, so you hold back.  You politely say ok even though you have no idea how to squeeze it into your day.  The day progresses and your stress accumulates but you manage to meet the deadline.  Yet your shoulder and neck are still on fire.  You still feel stressed out even though your work day is over.  Why?  Because you weren’t able to meet your Physiological needs.  You weren’t able to take a break and relax.  You weren’t able to do what you truly desired.  You just pushed through the motions to meet the minimum.  So what now? AWARENESS AND ACTION will set you Free.  So how exactly do you do that?

     

     

    Image by Bruce Wilson Graphics

    The first step was Deciding to Make YOURSELF the Priority.  Yep that’s Right.  You need to make your Needs a Priority.  That means you need to Invest in Your Personal Development.  This Unique Personal Development ensures you are meeting all your Unique needs to reach YOUR Self-Actualization.  The basic fact is YOU need to invest time, money and effort in new areas that help you feel happier, nurtured and fulfilled.  Why money?  The fact is your powerful mind won’t hold you accountable if you don’t invest financially.  Therefore you might begin to make changes but they won’t stick.  They might last a short time but without internal and external accountability your mind will eventually let it drift away.  Think about this.  You are more likely to go to the gym and exercise if you have made an investment or signed a contract.  If the Gym is free, you will go for a few days or weeks but there is no risk to you if you quit.  So eventually that is exactly what happens, you slow down and stop going.  Now, if you invest in a Personal trainer, you are more likely to push yourself to eat better, exercise and make shit happen.  Why? Because the investment hurts.  Just blowing away your money isn’t appealing to your subconscious. When you invest in a Personal trainer or program you are held accountable by yourself and the instructor.  Therefore, you are at an advantage to push through the resistance and make it happen.  Then you begin to see changes in yourself and that reinforces your drive to stick to the change and keep going.  So now that you understand your Human needs better.  Do you feel you are fulfilled?  Do you want to feel happier?  Do you feel you are living your life’s purpose?  Are you ready to THRIVE?

    The exciting fact is that you don’t have to start from scratch and figure this out alone.  You don’t have to try and fail over and over again.  It can be Easy and Empowering to nurture yourself.  Let’s Thrive Together.  All of this is Easily achieved with a Guided Path and a helping hand.   Your happiness framework is unique. It’s everything that helps you achieve happiness by meeting your hierarchy of needs.

    Let’s Cultivate a Routine that Helps YOU Blossom and Bloom. Nurture yourself Mind, Body and Soul.  The call is FREE, let’s Discover what makes you truly happy.  Schedule your Discovery call today.

    Categories Advice, Anxiety, depression, Fear, Health, motivation, Self-doubt

    Thrive in Your Life

    Some days are filled with challenges or obstacles. They can be internal or external. The external ones impact our body in many ways.  Some of us get headaches, chest pain, shortness of breath, etc.  There are many physical responses that happen when you are stuck in Fear.  They are all due to our bodies fight or flight response.   It happens in the moment and it is intense.  It could happen for many different reasons and in many different situations.  It could be a confrontation by a superior or elder.  It could be a conversation that made you upset.  It could be a TV show that triggered some emotions.  But the fact is that they all stem from the subconscious beliefs we made in childhood.  It was based on our experiences and lack of coping mechanisms.  We simply were never taught how to deal with our emotions: anger, sadness, fear, worry, shame, guilt, etc.  We had no idea what to do with them.  And the way we dealt with these challenges before impacts the way we react now.  The interesting fact I learned this past year is that you can Thrive in Your life.  The tricky part that most people don’t realize is that it requires an investment in self-improvement and development.  Yes, that’s right, an investment in YOURSELF.  You can make little changes here and there by reading books and taking free courses but you still feel stuck.  The shift just doesn’t happen because your subconscious still doesn’t believe you Really DESIRE the change.  Trust me I’ve felt it and I’ve been there multiple times.  You take two steps forward thinking you are on top of the world, just to fall back on your ass when the next obstacle hits.  Yep, exactly you read a book and started to change the way you react to confrontation.  You are doing well and then suddenly someone you absolutely love and admire, throws you a curveball and boom you are back to square one.  Your body responds once again with a deep sense of Fear and the fight or flight response happens again and again.  Then one day I decided to truly get out of my comfort zone and surround myself with powerful, successful business women and entrepreneurs.  They were women I admired and honor for their courage and accomplishments.  Women that have overcome hardships and turmoil to get to where they are and I realized that was exactly what I needed.  It took time and investments to make the shift in my life but it all focused on Self-Development and Self-Improvement.  And when I speak of an Investment, I mean monetary investment and time.  The truth about psychology of the mind is that if there isn’t a monetary contribution then You won’t make time and truly invest in the transformation.  So I did, I took a leap, I cried and second guessed myself many times but in the end I took a leap.  I took the leap because I deserved better than the life I was living.  My family deserved the best version of me.  I had worked on improving my health for 6 years but the anxiety was still there.  I had to work on that subconscious and I had to actively get out of my comfort zone.  And the investment simply motivates and pushes you to do it.  I attended networking meetings, weekly meetings, coaching courses and online programs.  Each activity brought me a step closer to where I wanted to be.  Nothing worth achieving is Easy.  Nothing worth earning is FREE.  You need to put the time, money and effort into your Transformation.  And I did, just that and it finally stuck.  And I know it stuck because I finally took action for myself regardless of the obstacles that came my way.  I finally didn’t let a confrontation, conversation or challenge stop me in my tracks.  I used everything I learned through my health journey and my personal improvement to transform myself.  That meant actively responding to my self-Awareness and taking Action.  Then suddenly everything fell into place.  Obstacles came and went but I kept moving forward.  Confrontation made me uncomfortable and I took action.  Taking action through awareness means feeling your emotions and sitting with them.  Then the true Action happens, using everything you’ve learned and practiced to regain your composure,  focus, commitment and drive.  That’s right, you get down and dirty to fix the problem in the moment.  That’s when you feel the SHIFT.  You notice that conversation didn’t bother your quite as much as before.  Your notice the self-care and self-love you invested in the moment worked.  You realize that you are actively creating again and that your future is coming.  This only happens when you are ALL into the Change you Desire.  When you desire change and truly want to transform then you will achieve it. But first you need to Invest in yourself and Your personal development. Then everything will fall into place exactly how you desire. You can THRIVE in LIFE when YOU INVEST in YOURSELF.  That’s right, Imagine you are Thriving. FEEL NATURALLY AMAZING with a little self loving and nurturing for YOU.  Sounds to good to be true. Nope it is Powerful and Achievable.

    Some people need a visual of how Awareness and Action works.  Here it is:  A few weeks ago I woke up completely exhausted and unmotivated for anything.  It was time to go to work and get things done, so I needed to suck it up and move Right.  But remember this, I woke up like a zombie. I drove to work like a zombie in autopilot.   I had zero energy, my eyes were droopy and I felt like I hadn’t slept in weeks.  I was completely drained and unmotivated to work or even think. I need to act quickly to shift things. Which meant taking ACTION to switch from a snail pace to a Productive and Powerful day. Then, I took ACTION: I stumbled out of the car to grab some things from the back of the car (yoga mat, Kasina glasses, sound bowls and ear buds).  I Stumbled to the lake like a sleepy kid to Meditate, Breath and Rejuvenate. I set everything up and laid down.  I put in my ear buds and Kasina lenses to stimulate alpha waves.   I used the techniques I have developed over the year to relax, unwind and focus.  I Listened to a meditation (made specifically for me), practiced my relaxation techniques and 20 min later…I was ENERGIZED and feeling FANTASTIC.  One funny thing happened in the middle of this little relaxation session that could have thrown me into Fear and Worry.  An employee at the Hospital actually thought something was wrong with me.  Remember all my senses were involved so I didn’t hear or feel him approaching.  When he said, “Excuse me man, Are you ok?”  I heard him and lifted the glasses up.  LMAO I actually screamed.  I am someone that startles easily so thinking back that poor man must have freaked out.  I told him I was fine and jumped back in for the last few minutes.  My heart slowly slowed its pace, my breath relaxed and my body settled once again.  I finished my routine and I was Vibrant, Motivated and Energized.  The obstacle that happened didn’t stop me from my goal of getting back in my groove.  You can THRIVE IN LIFE with more Self-love, Positivity and Nurturing. You are POWERFUL.

    Categories Anxiety, Developmental Delays, Fear, hope, kids, motivation, positivity, Self-doubt, Speak your mind, Worry, young brain

    School of Stress

    School stress is a normal part of life, Right? I am not the only person that got anxious for tests or presentations. I am not the only person that developed an upset stomach during Final exams. Have you ever had to rush out of an exam to explode in the bathroom? Yep literally, my stress and anxiety caused severe IBS. It was always an issue since at least 8th grade. I bet if you are reading this now, at some point in your life you remember a time during your education where STRESS was on your mind and evident in your BODY. Maybe it was a teacher that spoke to you in a negative way or put you down. Maybe it was an obstacle you faced early on in your education that caused you to loose a little self-confidence or created a little self-doubt. Maybe, your parents were very strict and expected perfect grades adding extra pressure to an already stressful experience. The cause of the stress response is usually related to a deeply engrained emotional reaction in you subconscious mind. Trust me, I had no idea this was possible until almost a year ago. I thought anxiety was a perfectly normal part of life. I though that it was just my way of dealing with school. It was normal for me to study my butt off, know everything by heart and blank out on a test. It was normal for me to second guess myself and switch the answer on the test. Then I would spend nights worrying some more after the test was over. And then reviewing tests, I began to recognize a pattern over the years. My gut first answer was usually right but I always managed to second guess myself and change it.

    Looking back now, I realize that my insecurities were linked to my learning disabilities and family history of learning disabilities. I developed this fear of school that progressively got worse over time. I developed a sense of self-doubt and worry that impacted me throughout my career. I didn’t let it stop me though, I pushed through and managed to graduate High-School with honors. I pushed through it, over and over again. Two careers and Master’s education didn’t seem to stop me but deep down the insecurities blocked me from finding my true purpose. Some how, I managed to graduate with honors time after time but the impact on my body was pretty catastrophic over the years. The Negative thoughts impacted me during my Master’s degree to a point of absolute panic. I actually remember a day where my research paper completely vanished off my computer. The file vanished. AHHH! Seriously, it completely disappeared a few minutes before the submission deadline. My stress and anxiety hit me hard and fast. It felt like a kick in my chest. Fear overwhelmed me and worry made me feel helpless. I dropped down to the floor in a panic and cried uncontrollably until thankfully my husband found it. I had never experienced such an intense stress response before. It was the peak of my chronic illness, anxiety and stress. It was my worst panic to date and I thought I was doomed but everything worked out. Thankfully, as I mentioned before I was a great student and my paper was amazing. Somehow, I surpassed my own internal fears and worry to graduate with honors, once again. But these embedded childhood challenges continued to arise throughout my life. Self-doubt, fear and worry would impact me in all aspects of life. I finally decided something had to shift. I realized that these negative feelings were not aligned with my path in life. I had succeeded and overcome so much, it was time for my mind to catch up and wake up. It was time to shift this crazy negative mindset and leave the past in the past. It was time to believe in myself and release the past. No one deserves to live a life of self-doubt, worry and fear. Everyone deserves to THRIVE NATURALLY in their own skin. Everything fell into place at the right moment in time. I was READY. I was willing. And I was dedicated to finding my path. INVEST in YOURSELF. You deserve to THRIVE. You deserve to feel Healthy. You deserve to feel Prosperous too.

    Categories accomplishment, kids, Mommy, motivation, positivity

    The Baseball Shuffle…

    The Baseball Shuffle took my by surprise. Little did I know that this little trip would change my outlook completely. As a mom of active boys, sports is an essential part of life. But each child is unique in their interests and hobbies. My oldest, Gabriel has always loved baseball since little league. The sport has become a bigger part of our lives over the past few years. This year things shifted even more as he ventured to a new school with hope of joining the school baseball team. I could see the smile in his face and the glow in his eyes when he made it onto the Belen baseball team. I watched the games but I never really understood the game very well nor did it truly grasp my attention. The games were long and a little boring to be honest.

    This past week in Cooperstown the universe shifted and boom I was hooked on baseball. I’m not sure if it was finally getting to Cooperstown for the tournament or seeing him play. Gabriel had been dreaming of this for almost a year. Or maybe it was visiting the Baseball Hall of Fame. The movie about the History of Baseball definitely made me cry. And I wasn’t the only teary eyed person in the room. I say person because it was emotional for men too. Baseball is America’s favorite pastime. It united America and brought a sense of hope to the masses. It was amazing the see the smiles and sense of awe in all the boys eyes as they walked through the museum. I was awestruck by Babe Ruth’s memorabilia and other baseball icons. And remember, I really didn’t show much interest in baseball until this trip. It doesn’t really matter how my mind shifted but it did.

    Gabriel, Frankie and Christian were finally at Cooperstown. The smiles on their faces were priceless. I could see Gabriel’s dreams were at his fingertips. He was living his 12 year old dream. Something he had hoped and wished for but wasn’t sure it would manifest. Things worked out in the end and he joined his old baseball team Hardball to participate in the tournament. And he even invited a few friends from Belen too. They were all so excited to spend a week hanging with their friends and playing baseball. We were all ecstatic to watch them play. It was amazing to see how ALL the boys had improved over the past year. But the 3 peas brought a unique smile to our faces and glow in our hearts. Gabriel, Frankie and Christian had developed a unique bond over the past year. And they were ready to play BALL.

    It was a rainy week in Cooperstown Allstar Village. And games were cancelled so we headed to the Hall of Fame. I couldn’t help but smile when I looked at my son’s face hanging out with his team or playing baseball. All the parents were anxious when their kid was up to bat or catch the baseball. I had never really been paying such close attention to a game but his week was intense. I had seen my son work so hard over this past year. Playing baseball 4 to 5 times a week. Taking hitting and pitching lessons. Countless hours of working his butt off and playing for a team that consistently lost. It must have been the most frustrating thing for him and the other peas in the pod (Frankie and Christian). It was frustrating for all of us to watch. Maybe that was part of the detachment I had. Or maybe it was that the games dragged on until eternity. But either way all of us were frustrated and this tournament began to shift it all. My son had a goal and it was Cooperstown. He has more goals like playing on the 7th grade team at his Belen. And Cooperstown is like the Holy grail of baseball for an 11 or 12 year old baseball loving boy. If your child plays baseball or you love the sport then you completely understand. My son and husband love the sport. My little one (Lucas) has other sports dreams; baseball wasn’t his cup of tea. We knew that this week was our one and only chance at participating in Cooperstown. Gabriel is almost 13 and this was his last shot.

    I’m not sure why Baseball hadn’t caught my attention until Cooperstown. For some reason until this very surreal moment in time I hadn’t loved baseball. I wonder? Does my father love baseball? Of course he does, he talks about it all the time with Gabriel and Robert. But I can’t remember, Did he watch baseball? Did we watch it together? Was it a guy only tradition or were girls there too? I wish I knew. I guess I need to ask him. I’ll figure it out soon. But let’s get back to Cooperstown. Our entire family and small circle of friends were all looking forward to this tournament since early this year. The boys have been practicing like crazy to get to this tournament. They were a trio of buddies excited to visit Cooperstown together. They were like 3 peas in a pod. We hung out together every chance we got and this little adventure would bring us all closer together than ever before. Little did I know that Baseball was going to be my new favorite sport. The pressure was on for all of us. The kids and the parents felt the pressure. Each game was nerve racking and each parent had their own way of dealing with the stress. We also all had our own funny superstitious tricks up our sleeves. Some parents wouldn’t look at their kid when they were up to bat. To nervous to see it all unfold. But I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him. Gabriel had worked so hard this year. He had made MVP on his school team, which he brushed off as no big deal but it is a huge deal. He had improved his pitching, catching and hitting so much since last year. For some reason he was nervous in Cooperstown and he wasn’t using his own bat. It was frustrating but you can’t push a pre-teen boy. You just have to let them try it out and come up with the decision on their own. Oh boy did I want to tell him something but he was frustrated enough on his own. I get it because I used to be the same way, I didn’t believe in myself and had to work through it on my own. So we patiently waited watching him play game after game with his frustration increasing.

    Then one day, Wednesday June 19th everything shifted for him. I was so nervous that I couldn’t sit. I was literally pacing back and forth as I watched the game unfold. He finally grabbed his own bat and I jumped and screamed like a school girl. He hit his first home run in Field #33. It didn’t stop there. He went on to have a Grand Slam in field #33. I jumped and screamed again. All the parents were so excited. They had been waiting for Gabriel to hit it out of the park. He was selected by his coach for the Home Run derby in the beginning of the tournament (Sunday) but for some reason he didn’t use his bat until Wednesday. I’m not sure what shifted but we all had our superstitions and little tricks. Before that game I prayed and sent him some blessings. I even blessed his gatorade before I handed it to him. I was wearing all Blue (Baseball shirt, yoga pants, undies and all). Even the face of my watch mysteriously changed to blue on its own. My shirt said, “There’s no crying in Baseball.” We honestly don’t know what shifted on that Wednesday but I do know that Wednesday’s have been a big transition day for me over the past few months. So, it could have been Wednesday, the clothes, the blessings or any other variable. The fact is that it was the most exhilarating experience to see MY son hit a baseball out of the park. To hear that ball hit the bat perfectly and zoom out of the park was amazing. I had jumped and screamed for Christian too but this was my boy and I screamed like crazy. He had finally fulfilled his dream and hit a home run in Cooperstown. He ended up hitting 3 home runs that day. We couldn’t be any prouder of him. He was so happy and the boys were all jumping up too. He did it. He finally fulfilled his dream and were were all ecstatic. Let’s just say Baseball has a new place in my heart. I never though the game could excite me so much, that I would scream at the top of my lungs and jump like a kid but I did. Cooperstown was an amazing experience for all of us. It was exhausting, stressful and exhilarating all at once. We enjoyed the bonding experience to the fullest and I’m thankful that Gabriel achieved his dream.

    P.S. One funny thing that happened in Cooperstown that any mommy can understand. LMAO. Embarrassing but true. When Christian got his first home run, I peed a little. LMAO. I screamed and jumped so much that a little pee came out. It happens to all of us at one point or another. I haven’t experienced that in a long time. I workout my pelvic floor often but I had been holding it in too long and oopsie happened.